(NEW YORK) — Saturday Night Live‘s cold open this week ignored Robert Mueller’s Russia report, focusing instead on some of the celebrity scandals dominating the headlines.
The show opened with three prison inmates — played by Kenan Thompson, Kyle Mooney and Chris Redd — discussing who committed the craziest crime, before getting a visit from three celebrities also lock-up.
First up, SNL’s Kate McKinnon showed up as Lori Loughlin — better known to the prisoners as Aunt Becky from Full House — who declared her reason for being incarcerated: the “Varsity Blues” college admission scandal. Not even Thompson’s inmate, who killed his neighbor and ate their fingers, could upstage McKinnon’s Loughlin.
“You think that’s insane? I paid 500 grand to get my kid into USC,” she said, adding, “That’s not including the 300 grand I paid in tuition.”
When Thompson expressed doubts about her ability to survive in prison, Loughlin responded, “You think prison is hard? I’ve done 68 Hallmark movies. I have seen hell.”
“I think being on a sitcom for 12 years made her crazy,” said Redd, at which point former Stormy Daniels attorney Michael Avenatti, played by cast member Pete Davidson, interrupted.
“Did somebody say crazy? I’m accused of crimes you can’t even conceive of, like blackmailing a sneaker company,” Avenatti declared. “I’m so shady even a porn star once said that she needed to distance herself from me!”
After agreeing that Avenatti was the craziest, recently extradited WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange, played by Oscar-nominee Michael Keaton, showed up. Mooney inmate wasn’t afraid of Assange until the latter snapped his fingers: “Boom! All your ding-dong pics just went on the internet!”
Emma Stone hosted this week’s show, her fourth time in the role, with musical guest South Korean boy band BTS.
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